Tracy Boyd

Chapter 1

She didn’t know what was happening, the people came and took her away from her mom and dad. She knew she was bad but never thought she was bad enough to be taken away. Dad was always telling her how much trouble she was, he had to feed her, clothe her, and get her to school. Mom said she needed more discipline, that’s when things started to hurting because dad had to spank her. Was she really so much trouble thy were giving her away.
Mom would yell at her and tell her she was stupid, she was ugly, she was a complete disappointment. Then dad would hit her for all of those things, but she knew she deserved it they were always telling her how bad she was.
If she wasn’t ready for school on time he would make her take her clothes off and then he would throw her into the back seat with them. She would have to get dressed on the way to school. She only lived 8 minutes from the school. When he pulled in if she wasn’t ready he would pull her out anyway and leave her (didn’t matter if she was completely dressed or not). After school she would walk home because mom and dad had to sleep for work. If she made any noise they would put her to bed without food and fix the kitchen so she couldn’t steal any. She learned quickly to be very quiet when she got home, being hungry was awful. She wasn’t allowed to have friends, they would show her and teach her more bad things to do. On the weekends she had to do the laundry, if it wasn’t done on time she would have to do it all again before she went to bed. Sunday’s, they went to church, before they got there mom would tell her all the things she had done and tell her to pray God would forgive her (he didn’t like bad children like her).
Dad lost his job so she didn’t get to eat as often (there wasn’t enough to go around and the grownups needed it more). She went to school and told her teacher she was hungry, they sent some food home with her. When she got home she showed it to dad. She was very proud of her food, for once she was helping them. He got really mad; had she told the teacher they were poor, that he couldn’t take care of his family. Did she really think that bringing food home from school was a way to pay them back for all they had to do for her? She went to bed without supper that night, after that she never told anyone anything about what was happening at home. She stopped talking at school altogether shortly after (no one cared anyway). Mom and dad were fighting all the time because dad couldn’t find a job, mom was working overtime to pay the bills. When she went to work dad would come into her room and spank her with his belt, it was her fault he couldn’t find work, he had to take care of her. She knew she couldn’t tell mom; mom wouldn’t do anything she was to busy worrying about the money to worry about her anyway.
Her teacher tried to get her to talk about home. She just sat there looking at the floor. The school nurse told her she was losing too much weight, all they wanted to do was help her (that’s what they said anyway); she didn’t believe them. No one wanted to help a bad kid like her, they were just being noisy. She told mom when she went home that they were asking questions, mom got really mad and something else (she wasn’t sure what). Mom went to work and dad came into her room. Mom had told him about the people asking questions, he wanted to know what she had told them. No matter how many times she said it he didn’t believe that she hadn’t told them anything. He really spanked her hard that night, she couldn’t go to school for 2 weeks.
The people came to the house then. They wanted to see her, dad said she was sick and couldn’t see anyone. The doctor had told him to keep her away from people. They said if he didn’t let them see the little girl they would get the police to help them. He told them to get the police then. They went back to their car and stood there.
Dad came up to her room. She had told them he was hurting her, he knew she had. Now she had to hide in the attack so they wouldn’t find her. She didn’t tell him again that she hadn’t told them anything, she just went up the steps. He followed her, took her to a trunk in the corner. She didn’t like the dark, but she didn’t complain, she was enough trouble already.
She didn’t know what happened. It seemed to take forever but he finally came back up. He pulled her out by her hair. How dare she embarrass him like that. She was never going back to school. She didn’t fight him the people must have told him she was bad at school. They probably wanted to tell her that’s why she couldn’t go back, but dad wouldn’t let them. He pulled her back to her room, then went and got his belt. When he came back he used it 20 times (he made her count). Then told her it was time to fix dinner and he didn’t trust her to be alone so she would have to sit in one of the hard kitchen chairs. She knew that was going to hurt but it was okay, she had been really bad.
Chapter 2
That night mom told her they were going to have to move because too many people here knew how bad she was. Mom and dad were really mad about moving they didn’t look at her or talk to her. They waited to pack her room last, they wanted to make sure everything they needed was packed first. Her bed and a few clothes were all she could take (no more room). They drove to their new home. It was small, she was going to sleep in the basement. It was creepy down there, spiders and bugs all over the place. She didn’t like it, but she was the reason they had to move so she didn’t complain. The thing she like the least was there wasn’t a window, she liked to look at the clouds.
After everything was unpacked mom and dad went to town to find jobs. They told her not to leave her room. They were putting a piece of tape over the edge so they would know if she did. She really hadn’t cried in years, but now she couldn’t see outside, she was all alone. She cried herself to sleep. They didn’t wake her when hey got home, she slept all night.
When she woke up she was really hungry, she didn’t know if she could get out of her room. Finally, mom came down and told her she would be going to school and she wasn’t to tell them anything. If she didn’t maybe they could stay here longer. They took her to school and told her they wouldn’t be able to pick her up so she would have to walk home. She wasn’t sure she knew how to get there but she was afraid to ask, they already thought she was stupid, it was probably something she should have known. She was really stupid not to know how to get home. That day at school she didn’t talk to anyone, the teacher tried but didn’t push her. She was new to the school after all. The teacher would find out how stupid she was soon and wouldn’t worry about her.
She did find her way home, it wasn’t as hard as she thought it be. They weren’t home, she didn’t know if they would be home soon or if she was allowed to eat before they got home. There were so many things she didn’t know, why did she have to be so stupid? These were things she was sure she should know, why didn’t she? Mom had told her over and over she needed to pay better attention, she tried but she couldn’t remember things they said she should, like where they had put her lunch box. When she got ready for school that morning she couldn’t find it, he spanked her hard. He showed her one more time, she had to remember. When she got home that day she emptied the trash out of her lunch box and put it back where he had showed her that morning. She was proud of herself for remembering, maybe she was getting smarter.
They came home, told her they had jobs, that was good because she could eat more now. They would be working nights and wouldn’t be able to get her to school. She could walk to school if she wasn’t too stupid to find it. She knew she could find it again, she had walked home. She would also have to cook breakfast and have it waiting for them before she left for school. They would be sleeping when she got home, she was to go to her room and stay until they got up. After they were finished eating and were leaving for work, she could eat and clean up after they left. Things didn’t go bad for almost 3 weeks, of course they had to correct her, she was a bad kid so it had to happen. They worked, slept and punished her.

Chapter 3
They hadn’t found a new church so she didn’t get to ask God to forgive her, that scared her, how was she going to remember everything she did wrong when she did get to talk to Him. Mom came down the steps on a Sunday morning, she had found a new church for them. Mom wanted to make sure she knew what to talk to God about, she also wanted to remind her that she wasn’t to tell them how bad she was, they didn’t want to move again. he was happy that she was going to get to talk to God again, she missed Him.
At church she talked to God and tried to remember everything mom told her to ask Him to forgive her for, she finally just said she was sorry for being a bad kid and would he please help her be better so dad didn’t have to hit her as much. It made him tired and hard to go to work. She had kept her eyes closed so long dad shook her to make sure she was awake. When she looked up she knew he was going to spank her when they got home. She wasn’t going to cry now, God would know. She would wait till it was over and go to her basement room with no windows and cry.
She had started doing that when they were at work. On weekends they would lock her in the basement. She had to pee in a bucket and empty it when they let her out. She was getting use to the bugs and spiders. She liked them now they were her friends.
The school started asking her why she didn’t talk, she didn’t answer. The teacher told her she needed to know if she could talk because if she couldn’t, they would get her help. The teacher said she would call mom and dad after school that day to talk to them. That scared her, she told them she could talk but didn’t like too. She wanted to run home and tell mom and dad she wasn’t to blame for this but she knew they wouldn’t believe her. Please she asked the teacher don’t call mom and dad they needed to sleep for work. Are you afraid of mom and dad, they wanted to know? No, she wasn’t afraid of mom and dad, they loved her. They kept her from hurting herself because she was so stupid she might get hurt. They loved her, they told her what to talk to God about, they were busy and didn’t need the teacher butting in.
Chapter 4
That’s when the people came and took her away. They took her away because she hadn’t kept the teacher from calling mom and dad. Now she was going to have to live in a place where other bad children lived. Mom had told her about that place, they wouldn’t love her and they would hurt her. The adults would expect her to be smarter and the kids just wouldn’t like her because she’s stupid. She cried all the way to the hospital, they said they needed to look at the places dad had punished her.
The doctor tried to get her to tell him what dad had done, but she wasn’t telling. She knew dad was going to be mad anyway, but she wouldn’t lie to him. She wasn’t going to tell them anything. She was too stupid to know anything anyway. The nurse came in and took pictures of her legs and back. She cried and asked them not to take pictures, please you don’t need to see how bad she was, she was a really bad kid. No, she wasn’t, she was a good little girl and her mom and dad were the bad ones, that’s what the nurse said. She was wrong, mom and dad weren’t bad, they loved her. They loved her and she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. They kept trying to get her to talk but she just cried.
A lady came in and carried her to a car. The lady said she was going to take her to a home where people would be nice to her. She didn’t understand, mom and dad were nice to her, they loved her. She cried all the way to the home, a short little woman met them at the door. The woman smiled at her, she took her hand and led her to a small room with a window and her own bathroom. The bed was little but it would fit her perfectly. She sat on the bed and cried a little more, she wanted to go to her bed, in her basement at her home, with mom and dad, where she knew how to act.
The woman came back in and asked her if she wanted to take a shower and put some clean clothes on. She did but she didn’t know if mom and dad would be happy about her doing that here. Your mom and dad would want you to be clean if they were here, she was going to meet a lot of new people tomorrow, surely mom and dad would want her clean for that. She was right, mom and dad always wanted her to be clean when she was around other people. Okay, she would shower. Wow, it felt really good to be in a shower again, mom and dad said she could only take sponge baths to save the hot water for them. After her shower, she went back into her room and lay down on the little bed. She cried herself to sleep. She wasn’t going to go home tomorrow, she was going to have to meet new people. Where were mom and dad? She fell asleep thinking of them.
Chapter 5
The next morning the woman made her breakfast before she got up, that was nice of her. Then the lady who brought her to this home came back and took her to a big building, she didn’t know what it was, it was scary. She went into a small room and two men came in to talk to her. She didn’t like that, the lady stayed with her. The men asked about mom and dad, she was afraid of telling them too much. If she told them could she see mom and dad?
No, she couldn’t, they were in jail. What’s jail? It’s a place they put people who hurt little girls like her. Mom and dad hadn’t hurt her they loved her, it was her fault dad had to spank her, she was stupid and did bad things. They all looked at each other, she didn’t know what it meant. They kept asking her questions, but she didn’t answer. Mom and dad were with bad people because someone thought she was too bad to live with them anymore.
They came in and put this thing in her mouth, it tasted bad, they didn’t tell her what it was for, just that they needed to do it. The lady took her back to the nice home, she got to eat a big dinner and watch TV, something she had never been able to do before. She took a shower and went to bed. She didn’t cry that night, she didn’t know what was happening but she hadn’t been spanked it two days, dad was going to be mad they hadn’t punished her when she was bad. She was afraid of how bad dad would spank her when she went home.
The next day no one came to talk to her, she got to watch TV again, she got to eat as much as she wanted. She went to bed after another shower. She hadn’t been able to shower this often in her whole life. She still didn’t know what was happening, but she was starting to like not being spanked. When she caught herself thinking that, she also thought about how much it would hurt when dad found out, then she would cry. She had been there for 10 nights, she asked the woman when she was going to see mom and dad again. The woman said she probably was never going to see them again. Why not? She wanted to know if she was really so bad mom and dad didn’t want to see her again, the woman said she wasn’t bad, she wasn’t the one who had done something wrong. Why did she think she was bad? Dad and mom told her she was, they told her all the time she was bad and stupid, that’s why dad had to punish her so much. She couldn’t remember things they wanted her to do, she couldn’t remember if she was supposed to clean the living room or the bathroom, some times she couldn’t remember what day of the week it was. The woman just sat and looked at her, of course she would, mom had told her not to tell anyone she was stupid now she knew why, the woman would make her leave and never come back.
She asked when the woman would take her to talk to God, she needed to tell him how bad she was, she needed to ask him to forgive her for talking bad about mom and dad. The woman said she would take her to church on Wednesday night, but she needed to talk out loud so the minister could hear, he could help her talk to the people who wanted to help her and teach her the right way to talk to God. She had never talked to God with help, would the minister be mad because she had done so many bad things. The woman said he wasn’t going to be mad, it’s his job to help people talk to God. He can teach her what to say and how to talk correctly to God. God would like her to talk to the minister, because the minister worked for God. She liked that, someone to help her talk to God in the right way.
On Wednesday they went to God’s house (that’s what mom called it). After the service the woman took her to meet the minister, she explained that the little girl wanted to talk to God and needed his help. They looked at each other in a strange way, like the woman was telling him something that she didn’t want to say out loud. The woman was letting him know how bad she was, she wanted to cry, no one had ever known how bad she was before only mom, dad and God. Why did they want her to tell them all the things she had been punished for, dad would only spank her when she was doing wrong.
She talked to the minister, he didn’t tell her she was bad just that God would love her no matter what. He was nice and didn’t make her feel ashamed of being bad, that was really different. She asked him if he could help her get back to mom and dad. He said that mom and dad would be gone for a long time, but they were going to find someone who would love her. She had never been told she was loved with out dad spanking her at the same time, so they were going to give her to someone who would be like mom and dad. That would be good because she knew how to act, knew what being good would take. She would get spanked of course, she was bad after all, but she knew how to be good for them.
She lost track of time, they went to talk to God a lot more than mom and dad had, she really liked that. Talking to God made her feel better, He was going to forgive her for being bad. She wanted to stay at God’s house but the woman said she had to go home with her. She like the woman’s house, she got to eat more than mom and dad would let her. She got to watch TV, she had found two shows she really liked, the woman did something called record them for her so she could watch them as much as she wanted too. She asked one day if mom and dad would be coming back soon, the minister said they would be gone a long time, it felt like it had been a long time. The woman told her she wasn’t going to see mom and dad again. She looked up at the woman for a minute, then started to cry, this was it, mom and dad had gotten so tired of her being bad they had left her. They had told her sometimes they were going to give her away. The woman pulled her on to a big comfortable lap, held and rocked her, something she had never felt before, mom said only good girls got to be held and got hugs.
The lady that took her from mom and dad came back one day and talked to the woman about her. She heard some of it, that wasn’t good. They were trying to find a place for her to go. Then the lady said they had found her dad, she didn’t know dad was missing, she could go home now, mom would come soon. She smiled but was afraid too. She hadn’t been spanked in a long-time, dad would try and make up for that. She was bad after all so she wouldn’t argue about the spankings. The lady came in the room and talked to her. She was going to ride on a plane with the lady, they were going to go meet her dad. She didn’t understand, to go meet someone meant she didn’t know them, she knew dad already. She remembered mom saying something a long time ago about her having a real dad, but he didn’t want her because she was bad so it couldn’t be him. Why did they have to fly somewhere to see dad? She didn’t ask questions, this was something she was sure she should know. The lady said for her to get some rest tonight because tomorrow would be a long day.
Chapter 6
She had a hard time going to sleep, she was looking forward to see dad again. She finally fell asleep and didn’t move in her bed. When the nice woman woke her the next morning she had gotten lots of rest. She could be good for dad today. She had breakfast for the last time in the nice home, she was going to miss the little woman. The lady came and took her to the airport she was sacred of what was going to happen to her. She asked the lady, the lady told her she was going to meet dad. That still didn’t make since to her. Why did she have to meet dad? She finally asked the lady. The lady explained that she was meeting a new dad, she calls him her biological dad. What did that mean? He’s the one who made her with mom, the dad she knew was a stepdad, he raised her, but he didn’t make her with mom. Do you mean the real dad? Mom said he didn’t want me. We will let him explain when you meet him okay. She sat and thought about what the lady had said, she knew step moms were bad, were step dads bad too. When it was time to get on the plane she was still thinking about real dad and step dad. The lady told her it would take 3 hours to get there and then they would go to the social services place (she didn’t know what that was) and meet her real dad. He was excited to meet her the lady told her. He lives in Texas and has a lot of family who wanted to meet her.
When the plane took off she watched the clouds, they looked different from when you were under them she couldn’t see shapes in them like from her old bedroom window. She liked seeing shapes in the clouds. She must have fallen asleep because it didn’t seem to take long before the lady was telling they were getting ready to land. She got nervous, would her real dad have different rules than mom and stepdad? Would he spank her for different reasons? The lady held her hand as they walked to the waiting car, she didn’t know what was going to happen, she wanted to go home to mom and dad. Now she was going to meet this stranger, she just hoped he would let her talk to God, God understood she was trying to be good. She squeezed the lady’s hand. The lady said it was going to be okay, her real dad was glad she was coming to live with him. He was glad? But mom said he didn’t want her. They must not have told him out bad she was, he wouldn’t be glad for long when he found out about that. Maybe she could be better with him and he wouldn’t have to spank her so much, she hoped so, it hurt to be spanked, it also made stepdad tired and he would complain it was hard to keep her.
The car stopped outside a big building, it looked old and creepy, there were probably monsters in there. Were they the kind of monsters who liked bad little girls? Was that why they brought her here, to give her to the monsters? When the lady got out of the car she slid to the other side she didn’t want to get out. It’s okay honey nothing here to hurt you. Your real dad is waiting in there to talk to you and take you home with him. Don’t you want to meet him?
She wasn’t sure. Come on honey, he won’t hurt you like your stepdad did, he’s a good man. What did that mean, stepdad was a good man too. He only got mean because she was such a bad girl. Didn’t they understand it was her that was the bad one not mom and dad? She didn’t say anything, she got out of the car and took the lady’s hand. They walked into the building, and a man introduced himself to the lady. They talked for a few minutes then he stooped down in front of her. He asked if she was ready to meet her daddy. She just moved closer to the lady. The lady told her it was okay she wouldn’t leave her alone with her daddy yet. They walked into a small meeting room and a really tall man stood up. He started to walk toward them, but the lady stopped him, she’s a little scared right now lets just sit down and talk for a few minutes. He nodded and sat back down. He didn’t look happy about having to talk, he was going to be so disappointed when he found out how bad she was and that he was going to have to punish her. She was so afraid she wanted to hide, that wasn’t something she had ever wanted to do before, she had always known she was bad so there was no need to hide, but the new dad didn’t know she was bad so she wished she could hide it from him.
The lady pulled her to the table and told her to sit across from the new dad. They started talking about the things he would need to know about her. The lady told him that mom and dad had been mean to her, that she was very timid (she didn’t know what that meant), and he would have to be patient with her (she knew what that meant, he would have to give her time to get use to the new rules), she was a really good kid but thought she wasn’t, the other dad and mom had told her she was bad and need to be spanked a lot.
When he heard that he got up from the table and walked to the window, she knew he was upset that they had brought him a kid he would have to spank and punish often. How could she have done that to her daughter, when he knew her she was kind and caring. He wasn’t really talking to anyone, but the little girl got up and walked around the table. She didn’t get really close but she did look up at him.
Mom is kind and caring, she just had a bad child and it made things harder. She said to him. He stooped down and looked her in the face. Little one, you’re not bad, your step dad just wanted a reason to hit you. I don’t know why he wanted to hit you, but none of it was your fault and none of it was true. If you will give me the chance I will show you that you’re not a bad kid and that I love you.
She looked at him, she wanted to believe that she wasn’t a bad kid. She didn’t know this man, mom and dad had told her she was bad, she didn’t know what to think. She gave the lady a questioning look. What is it sweetheart? She asked. I don’t know what to do, mom and dad said I was bad and now he is telling me am not, who is right?
The lady moved to sit beside her, honey, I don’t think you have ever been a bad child. You’ve been talking to God, maybe He is giving you the chance to show you with your real dad that you are good.
The little girl thought about that, God could do that, He could make her be a good kid for her new dad. She looked at the dad and then at the lady. Okay, I’ll try, but if I mess up will you let me talk to God? Of course, I will but I don’t think you will mess up. You can talk to God and thank Him for giving you a new chance. Yeah, she can do that. Do you go to God’s house and talk to Him? Not very often I work a lot on weekends so sometimes so I can’t go, but I do know that you don’t have to go to His house to talk to him. Really? I can talk to Him anywhere? Sure, He’s always watching and listening. He will hear you anytime you ask Him for help and when He does tell Him thank you. Wow, I didn’t know that, can I talk to him now? Yes, you can.
She sat down on her knees, bowed her head and talked to God. At first, she wasn’t sure how she wasn’t in His house, but then she just talked to Him like she would a friend. When she was done she got up and looked at the new dad.
Chapter 7
Where do you live? I live here in Texas, but I also work in Canada some, you will have 2 bedrooms, one in Texas and one in Vancouver Canada. You will also have aunts, uncles, and grandparents who will love you. When we found out about you we were all so happy. She looked at him with a strange expression. What do you mean found out about me, didn’t you know you were my real dad? No, your mom went home before she told me she was going to have a baby, she never told me about you. Dad told me that I was so bad my real dad didn’t want me. He was wrong, I want you more than anything in the world. I’ve just met you and I already love you. Would you like to go to my house and see your new room? Will it have a window? Yes, it has 3 windows. Three, wow, she would like to see it. She turned to the lady; can I go see the room? You can, we just have a little paper work to do and you can go with him to see your room. Would you like to color a picture while we do the paper work? Yes, please.
After a long time, the new dad came over and asked if she was ready to go. She was scared but she wanted to see the room with 3 windows. You don’t have to be afraid of anything, I’m not going to hurt you. If you don’t know something ask me and I’ll tell you. There are a lot of things she should know already. Not that many, this is new for you so don’t worry we’ll learn how to do this together. You mean you don’t know how to do all this, you’re a grown up. Grown ups don’t know everything, we make mistakes. We learn just like kids do, I’ve never been a dad before so I’ve got a lot to learn. The lady asked her if she wanted to go with him, she was getting to choose. She looked at the man and then back at the lady. She had never been able to choose before.
The man asked if she wanted to go get something to eat and then come back to see the lady again. That sounded like a good idea, yes that would be nice. She just kept looking at them, she was afraid of making the wrong decision, they shouldn’t ask her she was too stupid to decide.
Hey little one, we don’t care what you want to do. Don’t worry about being wrong, what do you want to do? She’s hungry, so she tells him she wants to go eat. She looks at the lady, she didn’t want to go alone. Would you like her to go with us? She nodded her head. He smiled and they left and went out to eat. She had fun, she liked the man and wanted to spend more time with him. Yes, she wanted to see the room with the windows and she wanted to meet the family he talked about. She asked the lady if she could to with him. Yes, you can, if you want too. He will have my number if you want to talk to me. I will come to his house tomorrow and make sure everything is okay before I go back to North Carolina.
She was afraid after the woman left, she didn’t know the rules this new dad had, she didn’t know what he would punish her for or with. She wanted to ask him, but she thought she should know already. They walk to his car, he opened the back door for her (something mom and dad never did), she got in, he reached across her to buckle the seat belt, but when he leaned in she jumped. I’m not going to hurt you little one, I’m just going to buckle you in, didn’t your mom ever do that for you. No, I always did it for myself, they said it wasn’t their job to help me. They were wrong, it is a parent’s job to help a child as long as they are alive. My mom and dad still help me all the time. Really, but you’re a grown up, I didn’t think grown ups needed help. Everyone needs help no matter how old you get you can learn something new. Now do you want me to help you or do you want to do it yourself? Myself, I know how, thank you for wanting to help me. He smiled at her and watched as she buckled her seat belt. When she finished he closed the door, got in the driver’s seat and left the scary building.
We are going to go to our house, I can show you to your room. We need to talk, I need to know what your afraid of and how I can make it easier for you. She looked at him and started to cry. Hey, what’s wrong? She didn’t answer so he stopped the car, got out and moved into the back seat with her. He wrapped his arms around her and rocked her. It’s okay, you don’t have anything to be afraid of, no one will hurt you. She slowly stopped crying. Can you tell me know why you were crying? You’re not going to tell me your rules, I’m going to have to figure them out, I don’t want you to hate me or think I’m stupid because I can’t do what you want, I don’t want you to have to spank me. I know it makes you really tired to take care of a stupid kid like me and when you have to punish me it gets worse. Oh, baby. He said, he unbuckled her and pulled her onto his lap. He sat and rocked her until she really calmed down. There aren’t going to be anymore spankings or punishments. What your mom and stepdad did were horrible things and I’m going to make sure you don’t have to deal with it again. We are going to be a happy family, my parents, brother and sister are going to help me become a good father. I’m going to make mistakes but I already love you, so I will do my best. She leaned back and looked up at him. How will I know if I’m doing the right things for you if you don’t punish me or spank me when I’m wrong? You can ask if you’re not sure what to do. You won’t think I’m stupid for not knowing? How are you going to know if you don’t ask? I will never think you are stupid, from what I can tell you’re a pretty smart girl, if you figured out how to do so much without asking. Honey, we are going to learn together. Are you ready to keep going? Yes, I’m fine, sorry I cried. You never have to be sorry for anything with me.
He sat her back onto her seat and she buckled in, he smiled and got back in the front. She looked out the window and didn’t talk, he said he would never spank or punish her again. He didn’t think she was stupid, he thought she was smart, what would he do when he found out she really was stupid. She didn’t cry again, she would just have to wait and see what he wanted her to do. She looked at him, can I ask you a question? Sure. Do you have animals at your house? I have a dog. You don’t have cows and horses? No, I live in the city and they wouldn’t like it. Did you have cows and horses at your mom’s? Yes, I had to feed them every evening after mom and dad went to work. Did your baby sitter not help you? What’s a babysitter? The person who stayed with you while they were at work. No one stayed with me, I may be stupid but I can stay by myself. I still don’t think you’re stupid, but it’s against the law here in Texas to leave a child under the age of 13 at home alone for more than an hour. You mean you will have to stay with me all the time, I’m going to be too much work for you. She started crying again. Hey now no more crying, we’ll talk about all of this when we get there. I want to stay with you, I can’t wait to get to know you. You’re not going to be too much work because we are going to work together to keep us both happy. She looked at him and she could tell he wasn’t lying to her, he really did want to make her happy. She smiled, though tears were still running down her face.
Chapter 8
He started pointing things out to her as they drove, it helped she stopped worrying and even laughed a little. They turned in to nice neighborhood, he pointed out a park with lots of trees and swings. (She had never been allowed to swing before, even at school.) He parked the car in front of the big house, bigger than her school big. He walked around and helped her out of the car, she was looking up with her mouth open. How many people live here? Just you and me. He pointed to a corner of the house and said that’s where your room is, mine is across the hall on the back side of the house. Come on, I’ll show you around. He reached down and took her hand, she jumped a little at first but he didn’t comment. They walked into a large room he calls a foyer, then into a living room, a kitchen, a separate dining room, a down stairs bathroom, and his office were all on the first floor. He showed her the door to the basement where he said he had video games and other things like that. We will have to get you some games down there so you will have something to do when my friends come over to play, he said. She didn’t say anything she thought basements were spidery and wet. He showed her out the back of the house where there was a swimming pool. She looked up at him, whose is that? It’s ours, do you know how to swim? She shook her head, then I will teach you this summer. She didn’t say anything, too much going through her head to talk. He took her up stairs and showed her the guests room (each one had its own bathroom and closet), his room (wow it was a lot bigger than mom’s), then he opened the door to the room he said would be hers.
She stood there looking at the most beautiful room she had ever seen. There was a princess bed with canopy and lots of pillows. She could see 2 really big windows, with seats in them where she could sit and watch the clouds. There were dolls sitting everywhere and a little house. She didn’t go in, there was no way this was going to be her room, no one would ever be happy enough with her to give her this. It made her sad to know that the new dad would be disappointed to know she didn’t deserve a room like this.
He stooped down beside her and asked: Why are you sad? Don’t you like it? We can change anything you don’t like, just tell me. Do you want to go in and look around? She did more than anything but she was afraid to want it, he would have to take it away from her. Little one tell me what’s wrong. I won’t be mad. She looked at him and he saw her tears again. He pulled her to him and stood up with her in his arms. Tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart. I can’t help if I don’t know. She didn’t say anything, but she put her arms around his neck and held on tight. He would want to give her away like mom and dad did when he learned more about her. He rocked from side to side holding her. After a few minutes he made her look at him. Do you want me to go in with you? She shook her head. You want to go in alone? She shook her head again. Then what do you want to do? She didn’t know, it was all so confusing. After a minute he carried her into the room and sat down in a rocking chair she hadn’t seen from the hall. He put her down on his lap: please tell me what’s wrong, why you’re crying, and why you didn’t want to come in here.
She whispered: because you will not want me to have this good girls room in a few days when you learn more about me. I want to like it and I want to stay but I know I can’t because of how bad I am. Dad was always telling me the room I had was too good for me and this one is 100 times better than that one. I know you said you weren’t going to spank or punish me but you don’t know me yet.
He didn’t say anything for a minute, he didn’t know how to respond. Then he said, I don’t know what your other dad told you, I don’t know what all he did to you, but I can promise he was the bad one and not you. I know it’s going to be hard but if you let me I will show you how a real dad treats their daughter. Will you try, for me, to forget everything he said about you and start over with me. I’m not going to spank you, I think you’ve probably had enough spankings to last anyone a life time.
She looked up at him, she couldn’t tell if he was telling her the truth or not. She wanted to believe him, she wanted too badly. Can I ask God a question please? She asked him, he looked surprised but said yes. She walked over to the bed, got down on her knees, bowed her head and thought: God I know you are forgiving because you have forgiven me for so much, I don’t know what to do here. I want him to be tell me the truth, but is that what you want? I’ve told you all the bad things I’ve done, the things mom told her were wrong. If it’s okay with You I want to have this room and be happy with the new dad. If you don’t want me to be here will you please let the lady take me away when she comes tomorrow? Thank you, God. Love you.
She got up and walked back over to him. God will tell me what I’m supposed to do, tomorrow, until then can I stay in the basement? No, you cannot stay in the basement but if you want you can sleep in one of the guest rooms. He said, she could see the disappointment in his eyes. Okay, please don’t be mad but God is the only one I could really trust when I was with mom and dad, so I have to trust Him now. I’m not mad, I just hate that your mom and dad told you so many lies that you can’t believe it when someone says your good. She gave him a little smile. They walked back down stairs, she didn’t know what to do. Mom and dad had always made her clean when she wasn’t in school, but this house was already cleaner than their house had ever been. When they got to the bottom of the stairs she stopped. What’s wrong, little one? I don’t know what you want me to do, the house is already clean so you can’t want me to do that. Do you want me to start dinner? He just stood there looking at her for a minute. Little one you are not here to work, when you get older we will figure out some chores for you to do, but right now all I want you to do is relax. Anything you want to do? I don’t know. You want to watch TV? You will let me? Yes, I’m going to let you watch. What do us usually do when I’m not here? I watch sports or go outside and play basketball. How do you play basketball? Would you like me to show you? Is that what you want to do? He looked at her and realized she didn’t know how to make decisions, they really hadn’t let her do anything. Let’s go outside, you can watch me play for a few minutes then I’ll help you try. Okay?
They walked out, he got the ball and showed her where the hoop was, she looked around the yard, then turned to look at him. He smiled at her then started to bounce the ball. She watched him play for a few minutes, then he turned and asked if she wanted to learn. Do you think I can? Sure, you just need someone to show you. She nodded and walked over to him. He got down on his knees and showed her how to bounce the ball. She was scared, at first, but he worked with her for as long as she needed. It didn’t take her long then she was bouncing the ball around the court and laughing. After a few minutes he just sat and watched you play. She was so cute, she looked just like his sister had went she was little. He wanted to cry, he had missed so much of her life. The ball bounced away from her it bounced right into his face. Immediately she stopped laughing and sat down crying. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have been playing, I’m sorry. You can punish me if you need to I’ll understand. He got up, walked over to her, sat down on the ground in beside her, pulled her onto his lap, and started rocking. Why would I punish you for having fun? The ball gets away from me all the time. It’s part of learning. Please don’t cry, we will figure this out together. He sat rocking her for a long time. Do you want to try again? She looked up at him. You will let me try again? If that’s what you want to do, you were having so much fun, lets see if you can remember how to bounce the ball then I will show you how to make goals. I’d like that, I want to try again, but what if the ball gets away again. Then we will catch it and try again. It’s fun to just try. Okay.
They got up and this time instead of watching he walked with her, showing her how to keep it from getting away from her. She started to laugh again. She started getting tired and wanted to stop but didn’t think she should say so. He smiled at her, you tired? Want to stop for the day? Yes please. How long have you wanted to stop? Just a few minutes. You didn’t want to tell me, did you? No, I was afraid you’d get mad if you wanted to keep playing. Honey, when you want to stop something tell me, I don’t want you to play so long you get hurt. Let’s go get something to drink.
They went into the house and he fixed the both a cup of water. At first, she didn’t want to take the cup because it was glass. It’s only a cup, I don’t care if you drop it. She nodded and started drinking. After a few minutes he asked if she wanted to take a shower, because she was hot and sweaty. She smiled, she didn’t have any clean clothes. I forgot to show you, my mom and sister bought you some clothes. When we found out about you, the social worker gave us your sizes so mom and Tabby went shopping. It’s something they both love to do, they really don’t need excuses to go. Do you want me to go up with you and show you where they are or do you want to go alone? She thought for a second then said I want to go alone, but will you come up and check on me. She barely had any volume for the last part. Hey, don’t be afraid of asking me anything. Yes, I will give you about half an hour to get your clothes and get into the shower then I’ll come check on you.
She jumped down and went upstairs to the room he said would be hers, she still wasn’t sure it’s what God wanted. She opened the closet and gasped. It was full of little dresses, she looked at every one of them. They all looked like they would all fit her. She couldn’t believe it, she had to be dreaming, no one would buy her this many clothes. She picked out a blue one. She went over to the drawers and got under clothes. When she turned around he was walking into the room. She jumped and dropped everything she was holding. Hey, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. It’s okay. Did you find what you were looking for? Yes, are all these for me? Yes. You ready to get in the shower? I think so. Do you want me to come in and show you how it works? Yes please.
He showed her how to turn on the shower, it was fancy. After he had shown her, he asked if she would need any help. No, I can do it by myself. Okay I’m going to go into my bed room, if you need anything just yell I’ll come back in here. She smiled and shut the door behind him. She was afraid he would see the marks dad had left because she was so bad. She showered, got dressed and went back into the room again. She walked around the room, looking at the dolls and toys. She stooped down in front of the little house, it had furniture in every room, there was a family. She was looking in the house when he knocked on the door, she turned. Mom thought you would like a doll house. It’s pretty. What do you do with a doll house? He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, walked over and sat down beside her. Are you mad? Not at you. Do you know how to pretend? Yes, I used to pretend the spiders would talk to me. Well that’s how you play with the doll house, you pretend the people are talking to each other. They fix food in the kitchen and sit at the table and eat. Basically, you pretend they are a family and you decide what they are going to do. Oh, I can do that if I get to stay. You don’t think you are going to stay here? God will let me know if it’s what he wants. He wasn’t sure what she meant but he didn’t ask her, she had been through so much he didn’t want to upset her.
I’m going to get in the shower, can you play in here while I do. Yes, you don’t have to worry about me, I know how to stay alone. He smiled at her, kissed the top of her head and went to take a shower. She sat and looked at the doll house for a few more minutes, then got up and went to look out the window. She liked the seat, she watched the clouds go by, she saw shapes in them. She had never told mom and dad about the shapes, maybe she could tell the new dad about them. He wouldn’t think it was because she was stupid that she could see the shapes. She almost went to sleep sitting there looking out at the clouds, but she heard him opening his bedroom door. She jumped up and looked at the door, she expected him to come in and be mad at her for something.
Hi, what are you looking at there? The clouds, they make shapes. She said, but she didn’t look at him, she hoped she was right about him not thinking she was stupid. He came over and sat down beside her. I know they do, when I was little I used to go out side and lay in the grass with my mom and look at them. Your mom would watch them with you? Yes, she was always playing with us, well as long as we let her. When we got to be about 11 we didn’t want to play with her as much, we were too old for that. She didn’t say anything, she looked back out the window. He watched her for a minute. Would you like to go out in the back yard, lay down and look at the clouds out there? Yes, please. He stood up and offered her his hand, she looked at it for one short second and then took it. They walked out side and lay on the ground for a long time watching the clouds. She went to sleep beside him watching. He raised up and watched her sleep for a long time. He got up and leaned down to pick her up, she jumped and woke up. Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you, but we need to go inside. She wasn’t quite awake, but she tried to get her eyes to open so he would get mad. Do you need me to carry you? She couldn’t get her eyes to stay open. I’m not going to hurt you, but I’m going to carry you inside and let you lay on the couch until you get your nap out. Don’t be afraid. He lifted her into his arms, she tensed, but when he didn’t hurt her she relaxed and dosed back off to sleep. He lay her on the couch and smiled as she curled into a ball. She was so pretty, he loved her so easily it shocked him.
He sat down across from her and just watched her. His phone rang and he answered fast so it didn’t wake her. Hello. Hi mom, yeah, we’re fine. She’s sleeping right now. We played basket ball for a while, then lay on the grass and watched the clouds. I know I remembered. I’m not sure it’s a good idea for you to come tonight. Wait till morning. I know you want to meet her but she’s really timid and still not sure of me I don’t want to add another person in right now. The social worker will be here around 10 to check on her before she goes back home. Why don’t you and dad come over and have lunch with us around 12:30. I promise I will talk to her about you before you come so she won’t be as afraid of you. Just remember when you come, you can’t just run up and grab her. I know you know that now but when you see her I’m afraid you might forget. I know how much you want a granddaughter. Okay, okay, I’ll see you tomorrow. I love you too. Tell dad I said hello.
When he hung up he saw she was awake. Hi, did I wake you? No, but I was listening, someone coming here tomorrow? Yes, the social worker will be here before she leaves and then my parents are coming for lunch. He saw the terrified look on her face, he jumped up and moved over in front of her. It’s okay, nothing to be afraid of, they will love you just like I do. I know you’re afraid of them but I promise no one is going to hurt you here. You are going to meet a lot of people, I know it’s scary and I know it’s going to be hard for you. I promise I will not leave you with anyone you don’t already know. I don’t have to go back to work for 3 more months, by then I hope you have met and spent enough time with them that you won’t be afraid of staying with them. Are you sure you want to go to that much trouble for me? Yes, I do. You’re my daughter, it’s my responsibility to care for you. It’s also my pleasure to take care of you, I’ve only spent one day with you and I can see how much fun having you here is going to be. She looked at him, then started to cry, she wanted to believe him. Hey, it’s okay, nothing to cry about, he picked her up and cuddled her next to his chest. He sat and rocked her for a long time.
Chapter 9
Will you tell me why you are crying? She looked at him, then slid off his lap. Looked up at him and started to talk. All of a sudden, she just wanted to tell him everything.
I don’t know when it all started, I remember it was before I went to school. Dad would yell at me because I’m stupid, I’d forget things and he had to remind me all the time. Mom always said I needed to pay better attention to them. I tried, it was hard because they would tell me so many things at once. The hardest thing was when they went to work, I had to stay by myself. It was spooky being alone, but I got use to it. When I was 4, mom showed me how to clean the bathroom, she had to show me three times because dad said I couldn’t learn. Mom taught me how to clean the rest of the house one room at a time, most of the time I got it right but sometimes I didn’t. They would send me to bed without dinner when I didn’t get it right. When I started school, it was better and worse, then I could go outside without having to feed the animals, but I didn’t have as much time to clean so I got it wrong a lot more often at first. That’s when dad decided I needed a different kind of punishment, every time I didn’t get a room cleaned right he would spank me. At first it was just with his hand, but after a while he used his belt. I tried and tried to get it right but sometimes I thought he just wanted to spank me. Then he lost his job and mom had to work overtime to pay the bills. It was my fault he couldn’t get a job because he had to stay at home and make sure I didn’t mess up the house. I was getting sloppy with my work and he had to watch me more than when I was younger. Sometimes I didn’t get my hair clean enough when I bathed so he would wash it for me. I was 7 when we moved to the new home, we had to move because the people at the school found out how bad and stupid I was, we got a new house and I moved into the basement. I started school and they got jobs working at night. I didn’t talk to anyone at school, the teacher started asking me why I didn’t talk. I wouldn’t answer her so one day she said she was going to call mom and dad to find out if I talked at home. I tried to get her not to call because I knew dad would spank me for letting the teacher know how stupid I was and we would have to move again. A couple of days later the people came and took me away. I don’t know how long ago that was, but I found out that I don’t like it when he spanked me and I don’t want him to do it anymore. I’m afraid when you find out all about me you will want them to take me away from you. I didn’t know the spankings were leaving marks until the lady took me to the doctor, they took pictures. What he did wasn’t right was it, he shouldn’t have spanked me like that should he? He like it didn’t he? Am I really as stupid as they said? Did I really do things as bad as they said or was it an excuse to spank me? I’ve never questioned what they told me until today. You showed me not everyone thinks I’m stupid or bad. So, are you going to keep me or send me away?
He sat there after she stopped talking looking at her. It took him a few minutes before he was able to answer her. I’m not going to send you away, I’m defiantly going to keep you. No, he shouldn’t have spanked you, yes, I think he did like to spank you. I have already told you I think you’re smart. I don’t think you did many bad things, I’m sure you made mistakes but everyone does. I’m glad you are questioning what they told you, I’m sure they told you so many lies that it’s hard for you to understand the truth, but I’m also sure you are smart enough to figure it out. My family, our family, will not think you are stupid or bad. I promise to help you as much as you let me. I’m your father, I’m your dad and I love you very, very much.
She looked at him for just a short second and then jumped into his arms. Please don’t be lying to me. I’m not little one, I’m not. I think God has told me what he wants me to do, He wouldn’t let me feel this good about something if it wasn’t what he wanted.
He held her tightly and said he was glad God wanted her to live with him. I love you so much already, and I’m sure that I will learn to love you even more. He sat there and holding her for a long time. It started getting dark outside before he let her go. Do you want something to eat? Yes, something to eat would be nice. She sat down beside him and smiled. So, let’s go out to eat, it will take to long to fix something. Where do you go to eat, I’ve never been out to eat before today? Well then let’s go out and find you something to eat. He smiled and took her hand. They went out and ate, she had a lot of fun and laughed. You have a beautiful laugh, I hope to hear to all the time. Thank you. She smiled then yawned. I think that means I need to get you home and into bed. Yes, sir.
When they got home she went into the room he said was hers and changed into a pink fluffy night gown. She looked around the room and then went down to tell him good night. Which room will you be sleeping in? She looked at him for a minute then said mine. He smiled. Can I kiss you good night? Yes, I’d like that very much. She stretched up and kissed his cheek. If you need me I’ll be right across the hall. She smiled and went to bed. Her bed, in her room, in her new home, with her new dad. She went to sleep without any trouble that night.

Chapter 10
The next morning, she got up and went down to the kitchen. He was already there cooking breakfast. Good morning. Do you like pancakes? Yes, I do, I usually have to fix them myself. Well this morning you are going to sit at the bar and watch while I fix your pancakes. How did you sleep last night? Good, I don’t think I moved all night. I’m not sure I’ve ever slept all night without moving around. When is the lady coming back to talk to me? She will be here around 10:30, then remember my mom and dad are coming for lunch.
What will the lady want to talk about? I think she will probably want to know if you’re happy and if you want to stay here. That’s easy, I want to stay. Is it okay if I’m still afraid sometimes? Of course, it’s okay. You’ve had a hard life to only be 10 years old, it will take a long time for you to stop being afraid of everyday things. Just promise me when you are afraid you will talk to me about what ever it is, even if you think it’s something you should know. I promise, it may take me a while to get it right away. That’s good enough for me.
They ate pancakes, he watched her carefully. She was being so careful not to drop anything her face was twisted. Do you know that most people drop food when they eat? No, mom and dad said I was sloppy every time I did, he would spank me for it. Don’t worry about that now, just enjoy your breakfast. She looked at him for a second, then smiled, and started to relax and enjoy eating. Is there any particular food you like? I need to know what to fix for lunch. She didn’t say anything, she remembered that his parents were coming for lunch. What’s wrong? Will they like me? Of course, I know you’re afraid, I understand that your mom told you that no one would like you, but she was lying. My mom and dad have 2 grandsons and no granddaughter, until you. Mom can’t wait to spend time with you, get to know you, she is the one who bought most of the stuff in your room. She promised she will be calm and patient, but she’s really happy to have a granddaughter. I’m not a very good granddaughter, I don’t know how to be one. All you have to do is be yourself. That is more than enough. You are the most important thing here right now, we all just want to know who you are and get to know the real you. Not the scared little girl you mom and stepdad made you. I’ve seen a little of her and I can’t wait to see more of her. You really think I will be someone your family will want to know? Yes. It’s that simple. She smiled and looked at him, thanks. What do you want for lunch? I don’t know, I like hamburgers. We can fix hamburgers and fries, that sound good. Yes.
At 12:15 his parents rang to door bell, she ran up to him, took is hand and hid behind him. It’s okay baby. No one will hurt you. Can I stay next to you? As long as you want too. He opened the door and his mom immediately tried to move around him to hug her. He stepped in between them. Mom I told you to take it slow, if you scare her she will hid from us. I’m sorry, I’m just so happy to meet her. I know but take it easy. His mom nodded her head and stooped down in front of them. I’m sorry baby, I didn’t mean to frighten you. I’m your grand-mother, this is your grand-father. We are very glad to meet you. She didn’t speak, she looked up at the new dad. It’s okay if you don’t want to talk yet. They will understand. If you need to go to your room to calm back down you can do that too. She was still looking up at him, she pulled his arm and he bent down so she could whisper in his ear. Can I thank her for my clothes and toys but not touch her? Yes, you don’t have to touch her if you don’t want to. Mom she doesn’t want to hug you or touch you right now, please understand and give her the time she needs. Of course, I will, I didn’t mean to come in here like this I’m just so happy the finally have a granddaughter. She looked at the dad, then whispered: Thank you for my clothes and the toys. You are very welcome, maybe when you’re feeling a little better about being here you would like to go and pick your own clothes own. She wasn’t sure what to say, maybe she could go one day but not yet. She still wasn’t sure they would keep her.
Lunch is almost ready do you want to come and set the table for us? Yes, please. She followed him into the kitchen. I’m sorry I didn’t want to hug her. He sat down in one of the chairs, took her hand and looked into her eyes. You have nothing to be sorry for, you won’t always be afraid but as long as you are, you don’t have to talk to anyone or hug anyone you don’t want too. Grandma will understand she was an amazing mom and so far, she’s been a great grandma to the boys. She nodded, looked at him for a second then put her arms around his neck and hugged him. Will you give that to her for me? Yes, I will. He said as he hugged her tightly.
They had lunch, she didn’t talk but listened to the grownups. They were talking about new dad’s brother. He was going to be a doctor or something. She would like to be a doctor someday, but she was too stupid to do that, mom had always said she would be lucky if she got a job waiting tables. She dropped her head and tried not to listen anymore. Aren’t you hungry little one? The dad asked. She shook her head. What’s wrong? Nothing. Yeah, there is. You were smiling and all of a sudden you stopped. Did we say something to upset you? No, I was just thinking about what I want to do when I grow up. And that made you sad? Yes, mom said I wouldn’t be smart enough to even wait tables. Honey that’s not true, you can do anything you want. We will get you started in school and you will be surprised at how smart you really are. The teachers never thought I was smart. That’s because of everything that was going on at home. You had to worry about doing things right or you would get spanked. When all you have to worry about is school you will learn quickly. I will help you if you need me too. You would do that? Yes, I’m the dad it’s what we are supposed to do, my dad helped me. I sure did, your dad had a real hard time with English, so nights we would sit up till after midnight working on his homework. Really? Yes, really. Mom told me not to bring books home they would distract me from my work. I expect you to bring your books home if you have homework or if you need help. She nodded, it was going to be hard to get use to all the new rules or no rules. Will you please finish eating? Okay.
After lunch grandma asked her if she wanted to help clean up. She told her she could do it alone. Don’t be ridicules, if we both do it we will get done faster. She didn’t argue, no one had ever wanted to help her before. Once in the kitchen she started to run water in the sink to do the dishes. Did you know that your dad has a dishwasher? All you have to do is put the dishes in and turn it on. Would you like for me to show you how? Yes, please. They worked in the kitchen for about 15 minutes and it was all clean except the dishes in the dishwasher. She followed the grandma outside where the dad and grandpa were sitting. She sat down on the ground and listen to them again. This time they were talking about football, she lost interest quickly, she lay back and looked at the clouds after a few minutes the grandma came over and lay down beside her. They watched the clouds and the grandma pointed out shapes. After a bit she started pointing them out to the grandma, she still didn’t want to touch the grandma but she did like her. They stayed for a couple of hours, then she started to get sleepy so they left so she could take a nap.
After she woke from her nap she went to find new dad, he was in his office. Hi, did you get a good nap? Yes. What would you like to do now? I don’t know. I would lilke to read if you have a book for me. I think there are some in your room, one of the dressers has a book shelf on the inside. Ok, I’ll go look. If you can’t find anything let me know. Yes sir.
She went back to her room, found a book and read the rest of the afternoon. New dad came in and asked what she wanted for dinner. She didn’t care, he left her to read while he cooked. After dinner she sat beside him and watched TV. She almost went to sleep so he told her it was time for bed. If she got read and into bed he would come kiss her goodnight. She liked that.
She slept soundly for a long time.

Chapter 11
When she woke up she didn’t know where she was at first. When she remembered she smiled. It was her new room, she climbed out of the bed and asked God to let the dad want to keep her. Then went to find him. He was in his bed, she didn’t realize it was still night time. She wanted to talk to him for just a minute but she was afraid he would get mad if she woke him. She stood there watching him, then decided to sit in the chair in his room so when he woke up she could talk to him. The next morning, he woke her. Hey, why are you sleeping in my chair instead of your bed? I wanted to talk to you but you were asleep so I decided to wait until you woke up, I must have fallen asleep, I’m sorry. Why didn’t you just wake me? I was afraid you’d get mad. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, she knew he was mad now and he would spank her. When he opened his eyes, they looked sad. Little one, I won’t get mad if you need to talk to me, I want you to talk to me at any time. I know that mom and dad would get mad but I’m not them. I also know it’s going to take a long time for you to trust I’m not like them. I love you! So, I can wake you in the night? Yes. What did you want to talk to me about? I woke up and didn’t know where I was, then I remembered, I asked God to make you want to keep me. I guess I just wanted to know if God had done that or if I was going to have to go somewhere else. I am going to keep you. You are my daughter and I love you. God made it work! Yes, ma’am he did. Now do you want breakfast? Yes, but can I help? Sure.
They fixed breakfast together, then he took her to the park. She loved it, she was outside and was getting to swing and slide and have fun. She liked new daddy, she wanted this to last forever. At lunch time the grandma came over again. She didn’t stay but invited them to come to lunch on Sunday. She was a little worried, but the dad said they would go. After the grandma left he asked what she wanted to do. Why do we have to go to lunch on Sunday? Because they want to get to know you a little better. We won’t stay long promise. Okay. The little house in my room, is it mine? Yes. And I can play with it? Yes. Then that’s what I want to do for a while. Okay, do you remember where my office is? Yes, I think so. If you need anything that’s where I’ll be just come ask, and please don’t be afraid to ask. She smiled, got out of her chair, went over and hugged him. Thank you. He smiled and said love you.
The next few days were strange for her, she didn’t have to clean anything, didn’t do laundry, or cook or any of the stuff mom and dad had made her do. The dad had a lady come in and cleaned for them. That was frightening on the first day, she moved around the house and would turn up when you didn’t expect her to. She told the dad it scared her so he went to talk with the lady, she came in and apologized for frightening her. She would be more careful until the little girl was okay. It was nice of her to say that.
Then she had all her clothes washed and hung in her closet, she didn’t have to help. She wondered around the house looking at everything, it was a really nice house. How had she managed to get to come here? She was afraid that mom and dad would come back and want her to live with them again. What would the new dad do if they did that? She was afraid to get too attached to anything, but it was happening anyway. She loved to play with the little house in her room, she had started sleeping with one of the dolls that was in her room, she would go and look in the closet at all the pretty dresses in there. She had never had many clothes, one dress for Sunday and two pair of pants for school, 5 shirts so she didn’t have to wear the same one twice in one week. Now she could wear a different dress 2 or 3 times a day and still have clean ones in the closet.
The dad came in to her room one morning and told her that her grandma and aunt wanted to take her shopping. She was afraid, she hadn’t been alone with anyone but the dad, would they be nice to her when he wasn’t there? She had never been shopping, she didn’t know what you should do or why you went when you didn’t need anything. She hadn’t answered him so he sat down in the floor beside her and asked what the problem was, why wasn’t she answering. She didn’t answer at first, she moved a doll in the little house to the bed. What’s wrong little one? I’m not sure what to do. What do you want to do? I don’t know. I’d like to go I think, but I don’t know if I could do it. What do you mean you couldn’t do it? I’ve never been shopping. There have been a lot of things you haven’t done before, why is shopping scaring you so much? I haven’t been away from you yet. Are you afraid of grandma or your aunt? No, I just don’t know what they will want me to do or how they want me to act. She hadn’t looked at him all this time. He just looked at her for a minute. Look up at me. She turned her eyes toward him. They want you to have fun, they want you to act like yourself. None of us want to make you do anything you don’t really want to, I know it’s all been new for you and it’s all hard to learn in the short time you’ve been here. But we all really just want you to be happy. If you don’t want to go then you don’t have too. But if you would like to try it, we can set a time limit for them. Make them have you home in no more than say 2 hours. Will that make them mad? No, I’ll explain it to them, they will understand that you are still nervous and don’t always know what to do. She didn’t respond, she looked at the little house and moved the little girl in it to the car. I want to go, if I’m okay in 2 hours can I stay longer? Yes, just have them call me, actually if you need to talk to me have them call me. I’ll be at home all day. What if I get scared and go crazy like I did here the other day? Grandma knows about that and she will be able to help you. I told you she was a good mom, she has handled all kinds of things when we were growing up. She nodded her head and smiled.
He got up and started to leave the room. Wait, she said, she got up and ran to him. She hugged him as tightly as she could, thank you for being my new dad. He hugged her back, it is my pleasure to be your new dad. They stood there hugging each other, the phone rang. That will be grandma wanting to know if are going, what do I tell her? Tell her about the time limit and about being able to call you if I need too. Okay. He let go of her and left the room. She moved back to the little house, she was so afraid of messing up, she didn’t want them to be mad at her for anything. She would go and try her best, but she won’t let them see her being bad. They will be here in 20 minutes, they said 2 hours would be fine and they would let you call me anytime. Do you want to wear that dress or do you want to put on comfortable pants? I want to wear a dress, but can I change into a different one? Sure, which one do you want? They got up and went to her closet, she pointed to a yellow dress that she hadn’t worn. It’s the color of your hair little one, it will look great on you. He gave it to her and started to leave the room. Sir, are you sure I’m worth all this trouble? She whispered, she was looking down at the dress. He moved back to her, sat down on his knees in front of her. You are worth all this and more, we don’t think of it as trouble, you are part of our family and we love, help, and cherish family above all else. She smiled, hugged him then went into the bathroom to change. He got up, walked to the window, looked at the clouds. God please let her feel safe here with us soon. He whispered the prayer so she couldn’t hear it, he didn’t want her to think he was doubting anything.

Chapter 12
The doorbell rang and she walked to the top of the steps. The grandma was with another woman she hadn’t met before, she guessed it was the aunt. The dad introduced the aunt, she smiled at the little girl, she looked so small, was she pulling herself in, was she that afraid of getting hurt? Hi, it’s nice to meet you, grandma has told me about you. I won’t try to hug you, but can I shake your hand. She didn’t say anything at first, she looked at the new dad. It’s okay if you don’t want to, would you like me to walk with you? She nodded, he took her hand and they walked over to the aunt. The aunt stooped down and reached her hand out, she looked up at the dad, he nodded and she took her hand. It is very nice to meet you, I’m looking forward to spending a couple of hours with you. Do you know what you want to shop for? She looked back at the dad again. She’s never been shopping before, you two will need to go slowly with her. Never? Honey, we will go slowly and we will start at a toy store. Toys? Can we find another little house to go beside the one in my room? Sure, it’s called a doll house. Do you like it? Yes, it’s nice to pretend to have a normal happy family, but I want them to have nice neighbors. Then that’s what we will start with, and you now have a happy family. She didn’t respond, she was still a little afraid they wouldn’t want to keep her forever. She gave the dad a hug and told him bye. I can call if I get scared, right. Right, even if you just want to tell me what you bought you can call. She nodded and went out the door with her aunt. Mom, make sure she feels safe, she’s really afraid that you two won’t like the way she acts. I don’t care how she acts, as long as she behaves. She will do that, but just don’t jump at her or anything either. Love you, son.
They were in the car for about 20 minutes, the grandma and aunt didn’t talk to her but talked to each other. She liked that because she wasn’t sure if she could talk yet. She was going shopping, she had a grandma and aunt who wanted to spend time with her, she was going to get to buy a toy, she might get to buy some clothes that she chose. That was a lot of new things that day but could she do it with out panic? She looked out the window at the clouds and prayed: God please don’t let them think I’m a bad girl. Please let me stay part of this family, even if it’s only for a little while. Thank you.
You okay back there? The grandma asked and turned to look at her. Yes, ma’am. Your dad said you like to look at the clouds. Yes, I like to look for shapes. I use to lay on the ground with your dad and we would look for animals in the shapes. He tole me that, the other day he lay outside with me looking at them. Did you like that? Yes, I like spending time with him. He likes spending time with you too.
We’re here, are you ready to go look for another doll house. Yes, but I don’t know how. We will show you, do you have anything special you want the house to have? I don’t know. Ok we will look until you find what you want and all the furniture and dolls to go in it. I didn’t know I was going to get to have that stuff too. Well a doll house won’t be any good with out the doll and furniture. Is it okay with the dad that I get that stuff? Yes, he told us to get you anything you want. Anything? Yes, anything. Wow.
They went into the store and she was shocked to see how many toys there were in it. She had never been in a store before but she was sure that none of the ones mom and dad went to were this big. She looked around at everything, she couldn’t believe this. Now she was sure it was a dream, because there just couldn’t be a store that was like this. She didn’t talk, but she quietly started to cry, she was going to wake up soon and be in the basement with no windows, waiting for mom to tell her it was okay to come to the kitchen and fix breakfast. Honey, why are you crying? She didn’t answer, didn’t matter she wasn’t real anyway. Do you want to call your dad? She shook her head, he was real either, and she didn’t want to dream about someone who loved her anymore. Will you please tell us what’s wrong? You’re not real, I’m going to wake up soon and this will all be a dream. Oh, honey. This isn’t a dream. Do you know how to tell if you’re dreaming? No. You pinch your leg, if it hurts you’re awake. Really? Yes, really. Can I try that? Yes, if you really think you’re dreaming. I do. She reached down and pinched herself on the leg. Ouch, it hurt. That means you’re awake. She didn’t say anything, but the tears started to fall faster. Why are you crying? Because you really are here, and you really want me, no one has ever wanted me before. The grandma bent down and hugged her. We want you more than anything, I have a granddaughter now. That’s something I’ve never had before. She hugged the grandma back and then turned to the aunt and hugged her. Ready to find a doll house? Yes. She said and she took each one by hand and walked into the toy store.
They were gone for 4 hours, she got a doll house and the stuff to go in it. She got a new colored bed set. She got clothes that she picked out. She had lunch at a restaurant that had outside tables. Then the grandma asked if she would be to afraid to get her nails painted. She wasn’t sure about that: can I call the dad? You sure can. Hi, grandma wants me to have my nails painted, do you think I would be afraid of the people who do it? Not if grandma and aunt are there with you. If I asked you what is the first thing that you think. Yes, I want to have it done. Then have it done. Thanks. You’re welcome. Are you having fun? Yes, I can’t wait to get home and show you what I’ve got. I can’t wait for you to get back here either. Love you and enjoy having your nails done. Thanks. Ok grandma, I want to have them painted, but will you stay right beside me. Sure will, what color is your favorite? Blue. Then let’s get them painted blue.
She was very tired when they got home but she was happier than she had ever been. It wasn’t a dream. She was really living here with a new dad, grandma and aunt who wanted her. She ran into the house and gave the dad a hug. What’s that for? Because you’re my new dad. He smiled, and said it sounds like you had a good day. Yes, yes, yes. Look I got my nails painted blue, and lots of other stuff. I’m glad you had fun. Let me go help aunt get the stuff out of the car. She went into the kitchen and got a bottle of water out of the refrigerator, she sat down at the table and looked around. This was her home, it really and truly was her home, and the people really wanted her to be part of their family.

Epilogue
It took several more years for her to really get used to being wanted, but everyday the dad told her he loved her and was glad she was there with him. When she started school, she found out that she wasn’t stupid like mom and dad told her she was, she was really intelligent and enjoyed learning. When she got old enough, he taught her how to drive, and got her a car. He let her go to the school dances, he even let her go out on a date with a boy, alone. She knew that soon she would be moving out and getting her own home, but she didn’t really want to leave the dad’s home. She supposed that everyone felt that way, but she knew what it was like to not have a good home. She graduated high school and then college, before she moved into her own apartment. Dad told her to come visit anytime she wanted and they planned a dinner once a week to catch up. Her new family loved her and she was a happy lucky young lady. Something she never thought she would be.

Chapter 15

“No stop! Don’t hurt her! Please stop!” Chris screams as he sits straight up in the bed.
“Son it’s over you’re both safe.” Kevin rushes to his bed.
“Please don’t hurt her!”
“Shh. It’s okay son, it’s okay.” Kevin is trying to calm him down but he seems to still be asleep.
“Chris!!!” Kevin finally raises his voice to shock him awake.
“Dad? Where’s Alizabeth?” Chris is now looking around the room, looking for me.
“She’s right here. She safe and asleep.” Keith says as he moved the curtain between the beds so Chris can see me. After he sees me he calms down.
“I couldn’t stop it. I tried to get free. I didn’t know what to do. Oh, dad I messed up I should have never got out of the car. I could have back up and got us out of there.” He whispers and falls into dad’s open arms. He cries himself back to sleep.
“Keith, I knew he would feel like this. We have to help him again. He was like this when he and Lee came to us.”
“We’ll help him, we did before. She’ll be the best help when she’s rested and starts to heal. They are good for each other.” Keith helps dad lay Chris back on the bed. He gently covers him and kisses his forehead.
“Dad??” I wake up trying to understand where I am. “What’s going on? Where are we?” I can’t see very well because my eyes are swollen and the lights are low.
“It’s okay baby. You’re in the hospital. You got away and saved Chris. Your both doing fine.” Dad gently puts his arms around me and I start to cry.
“Is Chris really going to be okay. He kept getting shocked.”
“Yes, baby he’ll be okay, just has some burns and needs rest.”
“Tommy.” I say the name with contempt. “he enjoyed hurting us. He said he is my cousin. Is it true?” I know dad won’t lie to me.
“I don’t know who he is. Keith turned him over to Agent Morgan and he being questioned. He admitted to taking you two, so you don’t have to go to court. We just need to make sure there isn’t anyone helping him. We think he was alone but we have to be sure.” He sees the panic on my face when he mentions a possible helper.
“He never had anyone with him. Dad I wanna go home.”
“I know but the doctor wants you to stay at least tonight and Chris will have to stay a couple of days.”
“I’m not leaving without him. He tried so hard to get free. Tommy wouldn’t have hurt him as much if he hadn’t tried to get to me.” I’m getting hysterical again. “Why did he do that he kept getting himself hurt more and more.”
“Calm down. He did it because he loves you and you were being hurt. Tommy would have done it anyway. He’s crazy and he wanted to hurt all of us, I think. He knew taking you would drive the rest of us up a wall. And hurting you would only make it worse.”
“Rest now, you will be able to talk to Chris in the morning.” Keith gently lays me down pulling me from dad.
“Okay. You aren’t leaving us, right?”
“Of course, were not leaving tonight. The boys want to come stay tomorrow and let Kevin and I go home.”
“Ok. You two need rest too.” I say sleepily. I’m safe and so is Chris, I can sleep.

Chapter 12


Keith drags Tommy to his feet. He tries to get away and run but the boys are all around him.
“Go ahead try it.” Growls Dewayne. “We’d love you to run.”
“Wayne.” Keith wars.
“Dad you can’t tell me you don’t want him to try something. Just one chance to clobber him would be nice. We all saw what he did to Alizabeth and Chris.”
“Of course, I’d like to but I don’t want the guilt that you boys will have. Now let’s get him to town. We need to get to the hospital and see how they are.” Keith is trying to control his anger because he knows he is setting the example for the boys. Inside he would love to beat him to death.
Agent Morgan meets them at the ER with other agents to take Tommy away.
“We’ll question him tomorrow. I have a team on their way to where he had them.” Agent Morgan tell Keith as the other boys run in to see about us.
“We left the door and gate open. One of our cars on the side of the road close to it.” Keith shoves Tommy into the other agents and walk with Agent Morgan into the hospital.
Most of the family is sitting in the waiting room.
“How are they?” Vin asks as they walk in.
“Chris has 2nd and 3rd degree burns. But he’ll be fine. Might have scars. Alizabeth is still in x-ray. Rob is with her.” Matthew tell them. “Did you get the guy?”
Chapter 13

“Alizabeth I know you’re hurting so we will do this as quickly as possible.” The x-ray tech says.
“Rob, where are you?”
“I’m right here baby.” He moves closer so I can see him.
After the x-rays I’m moved back to the ER but Chris is gone.
“Where is he, what happened? Why isn’t he here?!?!” I try to get up.
“It’s alright, he’s already in your room as soon as your ready you will be with him again.” Keith calms me down.
“Kevin went with him. He is fine baby let’s get you up there.”
“Okay. I want to sleep now.”
“Go ahead, I’ll talk to your dad if that’s alright with you.” The doctor says.
I just nod and pull Rob’s hand closer to my face.
“There isn’t anything broken, I don’t know how he managed that. She’s going to be in pain but it won’t take as long this way. She’s dehydrated just like he is, we can treat that with fluids, the pain with medications. The trauma is something she will have to work through with other help. Mostly she needs rest and family. Once we get her in their room will give her something to help with pain and sleep.”
“What every you think. She needs rest I can see that. How long will it take to get both of them rehydrated?”
“Couple of days. I know you have a doctor on the estate, he can take over in the morning and determine how long they need to stay here. Chris is actually worse with the burns. It will take him longer to heal. Your doctor may want to get a burn expert to check him out just as an extra precaution.”
“I can call him when we get home dad and let him know he need to come here.” Rob offers.
“Okay. You stay with Alizabeth. I’m going to go tell the others what going on and then you boys can go home.”
“You might have a hard time getting us all to leave.” Rob sort of smiles and looks down at me.
Keith smiles back. “We need you boys to get rest and keep things running at home, so Kevin and I can take care of these two tell they can come home. You can come back and see then two or three at a time. It will probably be better for them not to have all of you here at once anyway.”
“That’s a good idea. These two need rest.” The doctor agrees.
“I’ll go talk to the others.”

Chapter 9


As Keith drives he gives instructions:
“They are shearing tonight he’ll be in the barn. When we get there, I want each of you to go to a door. I’ll give you about 3 minutes then I’ll go in and talk to Donald. I’m going to pretend I’m just checking on things and walk toward the kid. If he runs you guys be ready to stop him.”
“We’ll stop alright!” says Donnie.
“Yeah.” The other eco.
“Boys I know how you feel, he hurt your brother and sister, but we don’t want to hurt him if we can help it.” Keith knows that if they get the chance they will kill him but he doesn’t want them to have to deal with the guilt later.
“Why?”
“Because you don’t need that guilt. I know you don’t think you will but trust me you will. He’s done enough damage without that.”
“We’ll listen to you, but I can’t promise I won’t kick the hell out of him it I can.” Vin says.
“I will agree to that.” Keith relents. He pulls up to the barn.
“Go quickly, don’t let him out of here. Be careful he’s crazy and won’t care to hurt any one of us.”
The boys move to the doors as fast as they can. Three minutes later Keith walks through the door and looks around. He sees Donald and then Tommy.
“Keith, I didn’t expect to see you. Have you found them?” Donald says as he walks up to Keith.
“No, I had to get out of the house for a few minutes. How’s it going here?” Keith is slowly walking toward Tommy.
“Fine, we’re ahead of schedule. Most of these guys have worked her for years so they are fast.”
“Good.” Keith stops behind Tommy, he’s almost finished with his sheep. “You like this work kid?” Keith would love to grab him but doesn’t want to hurt the sheep.
“Yeah, its cool. They find the girl yet?” Tommy finished and stood up.
Keith steps closer. “Yes!”
Tommy froze of a second, then turned and ran. He opened the door and ran right into Mark. Mark didn’t hesitate, he punches Tommy hard in the gut. Tommy drops to the ground. Mark started to hit him again but Keith stopped him.
“No.” He firmly told Mark. “Back off.” Pulled him away. The other boys ran up.
Tommy is laying there gasping for breath.
“How did you find her. I was careful. I know you couldn’t find her. I should have killed her sooner, but it was fun making her hurt. My dad deserved better from me.”
Keith bends down and drags him to his feet. “Let’s get you to the FBI, shall we? You can tell them everything.”

Chapter 7

After I hung up the phone I ran back to Chris. “Their coming, Chris are you still there? Chris?”
“Beth I’m here.” He’s so weak I can barely hear him.
“Alizabeth!” I can hear them yelling.
“Here, we’re here. Hurry. He’s dying, hurry! Chris it’s dad; their here.”
I’m hyped up now I can no longer feel the pain. I need them to hurry, Chris is dying.
“Hurry, hurry! Chris!!!”
“Alizabeth, honey, where are you?” Kevin can hear me but can’t find me.
“Here Kevin. Hurry, hurry!!!”
Finally, they run up to me. I point to the pipe. I try to get them to understand that he is in there and trouble. I want to help get him out. Kevin and Keith ran up to me and try to get me out of the way.
“Sit here with Vin, let us get in there.” Keith passes me off to one of my brothers. I’m still fighting, to get back to Chris. I know he’s dying and I need to get to him.
“He’s down there, please dad get him out. The pipe is too little for him too get out through. Maybe one of the smaller boys can get down there. Please hurry!” I’ve started crying and fight. I need to get him out.
“Matthew and Neil have already gone down there, sit still and let us work.” Keith tries to get me to focus so I’ll calm down, he afraid I’m going to hurt myself more. But I need Chris out.
“It’s bad dad, he’s alive but not for long. There’s no way to get him out through this pipe but there is a door down here, if you can find it we can get him out. Hurry there is some kind of electric shock happening to him every minute or so.” Matthew is talking very calmly but he thinks he’s watching his brother dye.
I heard him and I know where the door is. I jerk out of Vin’s arms and rung down the hill. “Here the door is here.” I shout at them.
“Vin hold her before she hurts herself more!!” Kevin snaps at Vin who can’t hold me even with all of his muscles.
“I’m trying dad but it’s like she’s crazy, with strength. I can’t hold her she’s too strong.” Vin is trying to hold me back.
Dewayne moves over to help him.
“Baby, loot at me.” He’s calmer than the rest as he sat down in front of us. “Look at me!” He gets my attention and holds onto my face so I can’t look away.
“You’ve got to be still we can’t get to Chris if we’re trying to keep you still. Look at me!” he repeats the command trying to focus me. I look straight into his eyes and say:
“He’s already dead isn’t he. I was too slow. He tried to help me but he couldn’t. please Wayne help him.” I’m falling apart now that I’m not fighting to get free.
“He isn’t dead and we’ve got the door open to get him out. Just calm down and let Vin hold you so you don’t hurt yourself more.”

Chapter 5

I’m beginning to wish I was dead. Tommy hasn’t really stopped hitting me. He’s said he’s punishing me for something. I just don’t know what I did. I’m trying to be strong and not give up but is seem so hopeless.
“Wake up little girl we need to talk.” Tommy came back in to the room and see’s me on the floor curled into a ball.
“I said get up!” he grabs me and pulls me up. I whimper because moving hurts so much. He shoves me into a chair and then squats down in front of me.
“That’s better. So, you want to know why I’m so mad at you?”
I just look at him. I don’t know how to deal with this, they protected me from everything. Chris is hurt badly and can’t help me. I don’t know what to do. I just want him to stop.
“I’ll tell you even if you don’t want to know. Your grandfather took my grandmother and married her. That’s right your grandmother was mine too.”
He watches to see my reaction. I didn’t care I was in to much pain. He slaps me, because I didn’t respond.
“What do you think about that? You didn’t think you had any family, but here I am.” He says like he’s giving me a gift. Then he punches me.
“See granmama was a happily married woman with a baby, my dad. But ol’ George he liked her, wanted her for himself. Of course, she thought he should get whatever he wanted. Just like you, you get what you want from everyone. Well you get it from the unimportant ones anyway.”
“I wanna go home.” I whisper. He laughs.
“He pursued her and she refused. She loved her husband and didn’t want to leave him. But good ol’ George didn’t care he was use to getting everything, just like you. He kept coming at her until she was afraid he would hurt her family so she gave in and left them. Imagine leaving your loved ones to protect them. Well she did, divorced grandpa and married George. They had a baby, your mama, then gran died. Think he killed her because she had a girl. You’d know all about that wouldn’t you.” He hit me again and I fall to the floor. He pushes the button and Chris jerks around. He is enjoying hurting us.
I can’t talk, can’t move my jaw, don’t really care anymore anyway. I just want Chris out and safe. I’m going to black out and maybe he will leave me alone.
“Well I have to go to work, can’t let the boss down, she’s a real witch and might fire me.” He laughs.
He picks me up and tosses me into the cell with Chris, he’s barely moving every time he gets shocked he moves less.
“I’ll let you two rest for a while then I’ll come back and finish this.” He says as he leaves locking the door and turning out the lights.
After a while Chris starts talking to me.
“Alizabeth baby I need your help.” He can barely talk he’s so weak, but he also knows this may be our only chance go get away.
“Alizabeth!!! Come here now!!!” he is shouting at me to make me move. “Alizabeth you have to help me, I’m going to die before he gets back.”
“No, you can’t.” I whisper.
“I need you to listen to me. I can’t take much more before I die. Please you have to help me.” I don’t know now but he really isn’t that bad he just needs my help. And I won’t let him dye.
Slowly I crawl over to him.
“Baby look up, see the drain pipe.”
I roll over and look at the top of the cell, there is a small opening. I nod my head, but I don’t understand what he wants me to do. I just want all of this to end for me, but Chris has to get out.
“Baby you have to climb out through the pipe and go get help. I can’t get free and I wouldn’t fit. If you don’t do this I’m going to die.”
“It’s to high. I can’t Chris please I’m sorry.”
“Alizabeth please. Try.” Chris is not talking very loudly and he’s crying.
“Chris, I can’t move. Chris?”
“It’s okay. I understand, I love you sis. Make sure you tell dad and the guys that I love them too.” He whispered and then stops moving.
“Chris?! Okay I’ll try. Please just hold on.”
I have to get out, I have to save him, they are always protecting me. This time I have to protect him. I move toward the pipe slowly, moving still hurts almost too much. Almost, I have to get out and get Chris help. As I climb every move makes me cry out, doesn’t matter have to save Chris. Finally, I get to the top.
“Chris, I made it. Please just hold on.”
I look around and realize we’re not far from the house.
“Chris, I know where we are, I can get help. Chris?!” he doesn’t respond. I’m sure I’m going to be too late but I have to try. As I start moving I keep thinking of him it makes it easier to move. I can run now. I’m in a field not far from the boat house and pond. At the fence I stop. I can’t get over this, but I think about Chris and climb over. I start running again, there’s a phone in the boat house.

Chapter 3

We drive around for what feels like hours. then we stop Tommy gets out and back in we move a little then he gets out and back in again. We drive for just a few more minutes the we stop and he comes to the back.
“Now your going to be a very good boy and do everything I say so I don’t have to hurt your sister.” He tells Chris after he opens the back of the van. Pointing the gun at my head he releases one of Chris’ hands. “Let yourself free and move to the door.”
Chris does slowly, but he knows it is to risky to try and grab Tommy while he is pointing the gun at my head.
Tommy unbuckles my hands and feet, pulling me against him again.
“There’s a door on the ground right in front of you. Open it up and go to the bottom of the steps.” He’s very calm and that’s worse because we can feel he’s thought this part out. Chris does as he’s told.
At the bottom of the steps Chris turns and looks back up to us.
“Move over to the wall and face it.” Tommy slowly walks me down the steps. At the bottom he moves sideways so he doesn’t have to turn his back to Chris. we move through an open door on the left into a big room with a cell on one side.
“Come on in and close the door behind you.” Tommy is holding onto me tighter as Chris moves into the room. When he closes the door, it bounces off the walls. “Lock it!” there is a dead bolt and I pad lock on the door. Chris locks both.
“Now move into the cell and put the collar around your neck and then fasten one hand in. you’re going to get a show.” Tommy is excited about what is going to happen. I can feel the difference.
“I don’t want a show I want you to let my sister go!” Chris is really angry, more than I’ve ever seen him, he’s a little scary too.
Tommy laughs and shoves me into the wall, he calmly walks over to where Chris is mostly tied up. Chris grabs him with his free hand. “Run Alizabeth!!!” He yells at me.
I get up and run toward the door but before I get there I hear Chris make a sound I’d never hear before, when I turn around Tommy is using a Taser on him.
“If you don’t come back he’ll die.” He’s enjoying hurting Chris. I don’t know what to do so, I moved back into the room and he stopped. “Chris are you ok?” I ask.
He doesn’t say anything but nods his head.
Laughing Tommy locks Chris’ other hand in: Chris has a collar around his neck, and straps around both hands, he is fastened to a pole that runs from floor to ceiling, he’s shaking from being shocked and still really angry.
“That’s better. I don’t want either of you to miss this.” He says as he walks out of the cell and locks the door. Chris on the inside tied up and me on the outside with a very happy looking Tommy.
Tommy walks over to me and back hands me across the face. I fall and Chris starts fighting his restraints.
“You okay cuz?” tommy asks with mock concern.
“Why are you calling her cuz? She’s nothing to you!” Chris yells trying to keep him away from me.
Tommy turns to look at him and pushes a button beside the door Chris is being shocking again.
“Stop, please stop.” I beg as I stand up. I hurt all over, but he’s hurting Chris worse.
“I’m in charge and if I want to do this then I can.” He says as he pushes the button again. He releases the button and moves toward me, I’m expecting him to hit me again, but this time he kicks me in the stomach. I fall, Chris fights, Tommy laughs and presses the button.

Prologue

I grew up in my grandfather’s house. He was very wealthy and he didn’t like girls. I was just a pretty face to him, so I was raised to be that pretty face. He showed me off at his parties and when he had to travel for work I had to go and behave “Like a little angel.”
Grandfather had a couple of men who worked for him. Kevin worked in the office and Keith worked on the estate. They’re my dad’s they do all the dad and mom stuff with me. Shopping for clothes (which they both hate but do away) helping with home work and teaching me right and wrong. They get that part wrong sometimes. I’m sure I don’t do that much wrong. Oh well they love me and the boys.
See grandfather really likes boys. They’re useful, they can work and learn, earn money for their families. (according to him I can’t do any of that stuff). Grandfather had one child, my mom (another girl). So, he decided to adopt boys to carry on the family. We now have 33 boys living here. These boys have all been hurt in some way. Grandfather goes to the boy’s home and talks to them the ones he thinks need the most help he brings home. They’re my brothers and I love them. One thing he has taught them is to ALWAYS protect me. They are all older than me and most of them are big (6 feet or more). I call the house the haven.
When I was six a man tried to grab e while we were leaving a play in New York. The boys stopped him and I don’t know what happened to him after that.
It happened again when I was 10 and 14. The boys always stopped it and I knew I was safe. It took me along time to understand why one of them was always with me, but grandfather did when I was 5 and then the kidnappings started. They were there to keep me safe. Because the protected me so much I was afraid they would get hurt.
This is a story about how one of them got hurt trying to help me.